Childhood Reboot

“If I could only go back…..” How often have we heard this phrase spoken by someone who want a reboot?Yet none of us can actually move back the hands on the clock of time to an earlier moment of life. So why does God continue to encourage us to do just that?

In Genesis 35, God tells Jacob to go back to Bethel. Throughout Exodus and even into the New Testament, the Israelites are reminded of where they came from. What is so important about the past? It’s the experience. The past represents encounters we have with our Maker. God wanted Jacob to get back to when he had heard God’s voice. A time to remember the covenant he had made with God. To get back to what had been seeded into him years before.

Recently, God gave me a vivid dream. It was as if He culminated my church experience into one event. The buildings were a combination of the ones I had attended during childhood and people were from every season of my life. All around me, leaders and people were pushing their desires and way of ‘doing church’. It finally built up to where I had enough and passionately stopped it all. I took one person with me and, with tears and much passion, led him to the old church building. Passionately, through streaming tears, I voiced, “You want to draw people in, get back here. To the altar! I never needed any of the other things being talked about because the power that was here made me excited to attend church!” I awoke from the dream and was still feeling the heart of God crying out to His people, “Return to your passion for Me!”

My favorite memories of church was what happened at the altar. From our senior women dancing in the spirit up front to the people whose lives where changed as they prayed through. I can still see the night as an 8 year old when I received the baptism of the Spirit. I see the altar in the small white country church, us kids and youth kneeling in prayer with the adults around us. My life was forever changed. Communion as a family around the altar. Everything of value happened around that altar. And I know from my dream that God is crying out, “Get back to My altar!”

The words I heard from a local pastor a few weeks ago still is reverberating in my spirit. “God never visits an empty altar. You want the fire of God? Live at the altar.” (Lee Shipp) Think about it! Throughout scripture we see God visiting the altar. We see His purifying fire on the altar.

God Himself is the one who ordained the altar in the tabernacle. Moses understood the significance. David yearned for time at the altar and was called “a man after God’s own heart.” Yet today we heard people in and out of our buildings by groups. We offer people to pray where they are and then send a text to receive follow up. But what about leading a people to that altar of incense. Yes. It can happen at home. But for a people who have never experienced that amazing, heart changing encounter of altar time, who will lead them?

I am so thankful for my dad, and pastor, who taught me the importance of time spent at the altar. It’s time for a reboot in our spirit! It is time to go back to that ‘Bethel’ moment in our lives. Clear away the schisms and seek His face! To cry out saying, “Your face, Lord, I will seek!”

Where did He first change your heart? Have you drifted from that intimate time with Him and been distracted by life’s events? Let’s reboot today!

All Inclusive

Highlights and disappoints. Both were seen this past weekend during Mother’s day. For me, it was a full weekend with family events. Yet sitting now and reflecting on our time, it is not just the activity with family that stands out to me. It is also posts and videos. Stories shared by others which left an impact. Family at times is complicated. Messy. Joyous and heartbreaking. But it all becomes a blanket of fabric that has been woven together and wrapped around us.

One post this weekend was from someone I admire, Tracey Mitchell. Tracey and her husband have a ministry headquartered in Dallas. Not only is she a powerhouse speaker, but she also has a writing style that grabs your heart and pulls you into the story. This weekend she had a post that spoke volumes:

As Mother’s Day approaches and pictures of smiling families fill my timeline my mind and emotions drift in countless directions. My heart goes out to the seven-year-old girl who will put on a brave face and battle through feelings of abandonment and rejection. She hasn’t seen her mother in years; may never see her again. My stomach feels tied in knots when I think of the young woman whose husband was unexpectedly killed last month. This will mark her first holiday as a single parent. She now carries the weight of being mom and dad all rolled into one. Tears begin to form as I think of my dear friend who will be unable to hug her incarcerated son. I cannot tell you the number of sleepless nights she has lost to grief …


Life is messy. Special days aren’t always special. For many, Mother’s Day is a complex time of reflection. It is a mixture of heartfelt memories and pain filled moments. What matters most is not what we have experienced but what we are yet to encounter. Maybe you need to experience the freedom of forgiving someone who wounded you or was simply never there for you. Trust me, the joy that comes with forgiveness is far better than a tear stained past. Maybe you need to bridge the gap in a distant or strained relationship. The initial step is always the hardest. Be brave. Be bold. Be daring enough to make the first move. Motherhood is not limited to birthrights or DNA. A mother is anyone who helped birth a better you. As you take a trip down memory lane pause and thank the women who supported you, defended you, created space for you and loved you unconditionally. Celebrate them. Love them. Honor them.

Such powerful truth! This is a Mother’s day message I have spoken on before. I can still see the faces of moms in one church I was speaking at who had lost kids to death. And the woman who was barren due to her husband’s cancer. Too often on Mother’s day we forget those women and they sit in our services hurting or feeling ‘not enough.’ But God makes His acceptance all inclusive and loves to show us creative ways bring this balance to our ministry.

“Honor her for all that her hands have done,
    and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.”

Proverbs 31:31 NIV

Another post that grabbed my heart was from my own daughter, Lauren Nelson. Although she has a son almost three and another who is just eight months old, God told her to go to Haiti. Alone. He was calling her to ‘come away’ with Him. After much struggle and tears to leave her babies, she obeyed. While planning the trip, she decided to surprise the other eleven kids that she has mothered in Haiti. The video of those surprised kids was priceless!

There were other posts that spoke as well. A niece who is a stepmom. A friend rejoicing over reconciled relationships. And the silent posts – those empty spaces where many hid from ‘mom notes’ which would be a reminder of abuse or neglect.

Yes. May has become a month for moms. But let’s not forget to minister to ALL women and recognize the spiritual moms among us. May our churches and lives be all inclusive when showing gratitude to those who serve among us. Honor the women who have chosen to foster, adopt, or just be that mom chosen by our hearts. And if that is who you are, we honor you as well for taking the step to mom whoever comes in your path.

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Fresh Start

Warmer days. Cool nights. Brown turning to green. Vibrant colors bursting through the green. These all point to the season of Spring. Green and color representing fresh, new growth everywhere we look. The smell of fresh blossoms is in the air around us. And with it comes the excitement of a fresh start.


Spring. Just the word brings pictures to our minds of opening up the windows, letting fresh air in, while we sweep away the dust that had settled in our homes during the drab, cold months of winter. As if going from death to life. We box away the blankets and sweaters. We step outside to breathe the fresh air, while planning time to get with friends and family for fun activities. Windows are shined. Corners swept of cobwebs. And everything just seems to come back to life.


Our current ritual of spring cleaning is not too far removed from an ancient practice that God orchestrated with the first Passover. When the children of Israel came out of the dark, cold season in Egypt, God ordained the first feast of Passover as a continual reminder of how He had delivered them They were to remember the night which they had been told to box up all they had and prepare for a desert journey. As they prepared their food for traveling, the bread had to have no leaven – or yeast. It was to be simple and without any extra ingredients that added flavor.


When we read the account in Exodus 12, God made it clear how serious He was with the putting away of the leaven.
15 You will eat unleavened bread for seven days. On the first day you must remove yeast from your houses because anyone who eats leavened bread anytime during those seven days will be cut off from Israel.

19 For seven days no yeast should be found in your houses because whoever eats leavened bread will be cut off from the Israelite community, whether the person is an immigrant or a native of the land.

What was so significant about leaven that He would cut a person off? Besides that to ignore this act was disobedience to God, it also represented things in our lives that can pull us away from Him. This act was to teach the principle of dealing with the areas that war against our spiritual growth. He knew that if we did allowed ourselves one slip up, it would be easier to allow another…..and another…..and another. In time it could eventually effect every are of our lives. Just like the yeast.

I love the smell of warm yeast bread fresh out of the oven. And baking bread is a favorite past time for me. No matter how large of a recipe I am making, I trust that the dough will double in size while just sitting there. Even after I punch it down, it will rise again. Eventually it is large enough to make bread to feed a family because that yeast had effect every cup of flour I had added to the dough.

Just like the yeast in my bread, sin or complacency will effect our lives if we allow it to sit too long without cleaning away every spec of yeast in the hidden corners of our hearts. Sometimes ‘punching it down once’ is not enough. This cleaning away of anything ‘extra’ in our lives should be continual. A daily sacrifice. It was to be an example of the spiritual act of ‘laying aside every weight and sin’ that should govern our lives.

Every Passover, the Jews spent hours cleaning their homes. The goal was to make sure NO SPECnot a single drop – of leaven could possibly be found anywhere in their home. And they still do it to this day. And so should we. Each of us should spend time asking Him what needs to be swept away from our lives. Sometimes it’s a secret sin. Sometimes it can be just a weight that pulls us away from time with Him and gets our focus on other things.
Galatians 5:9 gives the warning:  A little leaven leavens the whole lump.”
May we take time today to Spring clean our souls while spending time in His presence. The results? We may just find that He will breathe new life into old dreams!


2 Peter 3:14 “Therefore, beloved, since you are waiting for these, be diligent to be found by him without spot or blemish, and at peace.” ESV

Care for the Heart

Jesus is the key to broken hearts.

Sitting across the table from a young mom, I listened to as she shared her story of shock, pain and grief. A twenty-four-hour whirlwind that forever changed her life. I recognized that no words spoken by me would ‘fix’ her situation. While my nearly untouched coffee became cold, my heart was beating with a desire to turn back the clock and rewrite her story with a different outcome. But life doesn’t work that way no matter how much we may desire it.

After pouring out in detail the events she walked through less than a year prior, she shared the journey she has been on since. Disillusionment. Grasping for understanding. She keeps life turning for her family while balancing her own emotions – and still grasping the reality of what happened. Listening to this young woman as a friend, my heart ached for her with each detail. Listening to her as a pastor, it brought so much more depth of understanding to the need I see for the body of Christ to create ‘safe places’ for the broken hearts around us.

Safe haven. That should be a great definition of the body of Christ. Yet reality often reminds us that the body of Christ is made up of humans that sometimes miss the mark.

Like when tragic events happen.

Too often we have a heart that just wants to see the other person healed. To see their situation turn around and make sense. In our true concern and desire to help, we go into autopilot with our words and actions. We grasp at the first thought that comes to mind as we desperately want to bring comfort. After all, we know all the Christian idioms, right?

“God has a plan.”

“It was their time.”

“He would not give you more than you can handle.”

“It must have been in His will.”

Sound familiar? Words that have meaning as they stand alone. Yet these words can also sound empty even as we speak them. Why? When words are spoken in autopilot mode and not Spirit breathed, they become as ‘sounding brass or a tinkling symbol.’ Each of these statements have truth. But unless they are ‘God breathed‘ for that time, place and person, they will fall to the floor empty. Those empty words can even pierce a heart with pain.

We are admonished to be ‘quick to listen and slow to speak.’ What would the body of Christ look like if we listened to each other completely? All the way. Allowing the story to flow freely and having our minds completely engaged with the conversation. Undistracted by our cellular devices or even our own running thoughts.

Although it was over twenty years ago, I can still hear the ‘comforting’ words of a dear friend after my miscarriage. “You are not the first person to have lost a child.” And as she walked away, I picked up my bleeding heart. That was an obvious statement. Yet I was grasping with more than the grief of losing my baby. Our church had been in the middle of a revival. Miracles had been happening. And we had chosen to delay the DNC in order to stand and believe for God’s healing touch. Now, I was not only grieving but facing the disappointment of not having my prayer answered. Not having the miracle others were seeing. What action gave me the most comfort? The friend who just came. The one who just was. No words needed. Just their presence. That action showed me their love for me was bigger than their need to help me.

Sometimes we are not ready to answer questions. Instead, we sneak in a church service late and sit in the back in hopes to hide. We are not ready for the questions or comments. The group of loved ones surrounding us for prayer can be smothering if we are not ready. So how do others that really love you know when to run to you and when to just sit and pray for you? When they take time to pause and listen to the Spirit’s whispered voice.

“A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.” Proverbs 25:11

In this month where our society celebrates love, let’s examine our hearts. Do we love each other enough to stop, breath in the Spirit, listen to His counsel, and speak slowly? When reading the stories of Jesus, He doesn’t seem to be in a rush when He is giving answers. He didn’t even rush to Mary and Martha when their brother died. But He always did what His Father showed Him to do in a situation. Remember the the accusing crowd that brought an adulterous woman to Christ for judgement? He didn’t rush to answer but breathed in His Father’s thoughts, starting writing in the dirt, and made one comment. The crowd turned away. The situation diffused. All because He operated WITH His Father and the Spirit.

May we continue to grow in being Jesus with skin on!

Finding Me

Gods and demigods.  Spirits of ancestors.  Tribal rituals.  These characters are often found in the animated films.  And though in real life we know there is only one God, the story lines captivate even us adults.

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Spending time with my grand kids has become one of my favorite past times, and unless I have something else already planned, I jump at the chance to babysit my granddaughter who lives just around the corner.  To spend time with my grandson takes more planning as he lives in Dallas – six and a half hours away.  It might be a long drive, but the reward of time spent building that relationship is worth the drive.

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On one of my visits to Dallas, my daughter put on a movie that captivated my grandson.  He loves music and this particular film had plenty of musical pieces.  And the vibrant colors can be enchanting to the child’s imagination.  I admit that I was slightly disinterested at first as I have been watching the path that my beloved animated industry has been taking lately.  Yet knowing my daughter’s sensitivity to what she would allow to be in front of her son, I trusted her instinct and settled in for a family movie night with my grandson.

And God showed up!  That still small voice was speaking.  Even through the fictional gods and demigods, the true God chose to use the story line to speak my language.  To meet me right where I was struggling.

There is not really an explanation as to why I was less than interested when the movie started.  Perhaps skepticism. Or being tired from the long trip, followed by a busy day.  But whatever the reason, each scene started to draw me more into the story.  Gods and demigods put aside, the story of Moana, daughter of the village chief, had also captivated me.

(Spoiler alert!) Many years earlier, a demigod, Maui, had stolen the heart of the life-creating goddess, Te Fiti.  This destroyed the goddess and created the evil lava monster.  And the monster’s evil was growing, spreading across the miles of land and sea, and destroying all that it touched.  Death is what followed.  But this young woman, daughter of the village chief who had never left her island, did what had been forbidden.  She crossed the reef of their island, sailing on the waves of the sea toward the horizon.  Her goal was to find Maui and make him return the heart in order to save her dying island.

Then WHAM!  The climax of the movie!  The confrontation with truth.  It was that moment when the Moana starts walking toward the lava monster, Te Ka, as she has discovered where to replace the stolen heart.  This act would restore Te Fiti to true goddess status.  Each step she takes toward the lava monster, each crescendo of the music that built up the moment, and every word sung, flew its own arrow straight to my heart.  And I found myself back to that familiar question, “Who are you?”

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Through streams of tears, I played and replayed that last scene.   Moana had seen the truth.  She saw through the anger and hurt of the lava monster.  She saw what had been stolen with the heart.  She saw the beauty that was hidden behind the fire which had brought fear to many people through the years.  In the midst of the hot, fiery lava was the hidden goddess.  Although she almost turned back, no longer believing she had what it took to complete the task, something kept drawing her to continue on.  Alone.

Back on her journey, she finally makes it to the destination.  And knows it is time to face what had been feared.  Te Fiti, bound by the evil known as Te Ka, sees the heart and longs to be restored to herself.  The would be goddess lurches toward her freedom.  As the Moana steps closer, her words echo, “I have crossed the horizon to find you.  I know your name.  They have stolen the heart from inside you.  But this does not define you.  You know who you are.  Who you REALLY are.”  (Time to bring out the tissues!)

It is an age-old question.  Yet many still do not realize it’s deeper meaning.  Who are you?  Really?

Not: What is your name?

Not: What do you do for a living?

Not: Who is your family?

Instead –  WHO ARE YOU?

Years ago, while pastoring in Missouri, God led my husband to talk about breaking the patterns in our lives that were shown to us by others.  We are creatures of habits.  So often we set our table the same way grandma did because, you never know, “she just might be watching from heaven.”  He explained how we often discipline our kids the way our parents disciplines us.  The way we talk, our mannerisms, often are actions we have learned through what was mirrored to us as children.  Old patterns passed from one generation to the next.  Yet those patterns many times often represented human opinions of how things should be handled instead of God’s true nature.  For about three weeks, you could almost hear a pin drop among our small congregation.  The words were hitting deep inside many of those listening as they realized the old patterns had brought much hurt that needed healing.  Others realized the damage they had done to their own kids because they had followed unhealthy patterns.

At the same time our church was walking through this teaching, our women were scheduled to attend a conference.  When we arrived that first night, you could still sense where some of the women were in their processing of the things they were learning.  We entered into worship and I watched as different individuals ministered to each other.  Then came the first speaker.  She was giving her testimony.  And, like He always does, God showed that He had planned the timing of this event.  The speaker shared how she had fought depression and went to see a Christian counselor.  And he asked, “Who are you?”  And she proceeded to share of her journey to wholeness and finding out who she really was in Christ.  Who she was created to be.  Her gifts.  Her calling.

After that weekend, I realized it was time to start a Bible study with these ladies and help them on their journey of finding out who they truly were… at the very core of their being.

Looking back, I take such joy in seeing the fruit that was a result of our small group of ladies.  None of us have reached the status of perfection, but each of have grown so much along the journey.

Since a child, I have always known who I was in Christ.  Yet often I did not recognize that even in my knowing, I still did not have the full picture of how He wanted to use my giftings.  In the last 10 years, I have watched as one by one my dreams have been shattered.  My trust has been betrayed.  My heart broken.  And, yes, I have had those times of questioning if what I believed was all just my imagination or actually God’s plan from the beginning.  In the midst of the hurt and disappointment, I lost me.  I lost that confidence of who I was.  Now began my journey once again to find healing of my wounds.  And to find me in the midst of a confusing time.

In the midst of my journey, He has stripped away my thoughts of what my calling should ‘look like.’  I am a pastor.  I am a teacher.  I am a minister.  But above all, I AM A DAUGHTER OF THE MOST HIGH GOD!!

As a pastor, we picture a building full of people.  But honestly, a pastor is one who continually looks after the care of others.  I can do that through email or text or social media.  I can do that over coffee.  Or lemonade.  I can do that through the phone on a weekly call.  Because who I am is not tied to a building or a denomination or a group of people.  It is tied to My Heavenly Father.  It is tied to The King!  My confidence is in knowing I am His.  People, circumstances, or positions do not define me.  Only Christ has that right in my life.

 

What about you?  Do you know who you are?  Or have you lost you?  As the Rita Springer worship song says, “When I thought I lost me, You knew where I left me, You reintroduced me to Your love.  You picked up all my pieces, put me back together, You are the defender of my heart.”

He has my heart.  He is my Defender.  He is my lover.  He is ABBA!  Father God!  And me?

I am a victorious daughter of the most High King!  I am a Priest in His Kingdom!  And I win!!

I found me again……..in the midst of the mess……..He held my heart in His hands…..and held me in His arms.

And He has you……….Go!  Find you again!  He will replace your heart and restore your dreams.

A Royal Wedding

Yesterday, the world watched as another royal wedding took place in England.  The younger son of the late Princess Diana, whose wedding also captured the world in 1981, was celebrated by millions.  Each detail of the wedding was discussed on cable networks.  Details such as how many quests were invited, celebrity guests in attendance, what the bride and groom wore, who made the dress, how many flowers were used, where the reception would be held, what was on the menu.  People wanted to know every detail of this magnificent event.  Those who were invited and accepted the invitation were able to witness this firsthand inside the chapel.  And thousands lined the streets outside to get a glimpse of the historic event.

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Months planning went into the details of this wedding.  From the typical decisions of bridal attire to the intricate details of security, no item was overlooked.  The cake represented both Britain and American tastes and boasted of fresh flowers that were added just at the right time in order to keep their beauty vibrant.  No doubt the Queen had to be involved in some of the planning due to her understanding of the importance of their family lineage. And this American bride probably had her homework to do in order to be prepared to step into the role of a Royal.  She is preparing to give up the way of life she has previously known.

Both bride and groom prepared for this historic day with anticipation.  Each with their own tasks to accomplish.  For the bride, no doubt her biggest goal was preparing herself for that moment when she would walk in the door and her groom’s gaze would be fixed on her.  She would have wanted to shine in beauty and strength, allowing her eyes to shine with the love she had for her groom.

In the week to come, people will still be talking about this wedding.  Friends will be asking each other, “Did you watch the wedding?”  There will be no need to mention which wedding as the images of Prince Harry’s wedding will be foremost on everyone’s mind.

Prince Harry’s wedding made history.  Not just because the Prince is a male descendant within Buckingham Palace.  That alone made it unique.  But what stood out even more with this wedding was the breaking of traditions which had been in place for centuries.  Harry married an American.  His bride is not only American and thus not of a royal or European title, she is a divorced American actress of biracial birth.  And she brought that culture into the ceremony.  This British royal wedding had an American minister who brought a fiery message about the love of Jesus.  And let’s not forget about the African American choir singing joyously.  All of this and more has marked this wedding as a remarkable event on many levels.  According to tradition, Megan Markle should never have stepped foot inside St. George’s chapel on May 19, 2018.  But there was a Prince who had a deep enough love for her who chose to break traditional boundaries in order to have the one he loved accepted into his world.  He gave a token of his love to his bride, a ring made of jewels from his own royal mom’s collection.  His bride accepted that token with joy and love shinning through her eyes!

There is another royal wedding coming.  It will also capture the attention of the world.  And like Megan Markle, the bride should not be able to enter into this ceremony.  Much planning is going into the wedding.  Every detail is being worked out.  And the Head of the Family is the One giving the final approval.

Who is this Bride?  Me.  And hopefully, You.  The Groom is Jesus.  The Family line is Holy.  No Bride can enter into this marriage without being holy.  No bride is worthy of this holiness.  Yet Jesus’ love was so great, He chose to break the wall between His Father’s holy throne and the human race that is born into sin.  His token of love He has already offered – His death on a cross. He bled for me to be accepted into His Father’s world.

All of humanity will be watching this wedding, yet not all will be guests inside the ceremony.  For some, they will always remain outside the royal, heavenly home.  They will watch from a place heated with a tormenting separation from all that is holy.  Why?  Because they refused the invitation – Jesus and His cross.

There is coming a wedding day.  One that will outshine all others.  One that will bring a joy no human has ever known.  I AM THAT ROYAL BRIDE!  I AM MARRYING THE KING OF ALL KINGS!  My goal is to learn all I can to make my heart and my life ready for the day I will be dressed in His glory to be His Bride. I choose to give up my previous way of life and prepare to rule with my King!  I am preparing for that day!  How about you?

Accept His expression of love today.  Let’s get ready for our own eternal Royal Wedding!

Catching Foxes

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It takes two to make a relationship work well.  A team.  A give and take.  Iron sharpening iron.  We see this played out in every area of life whether in personal relationships, a body of believers, or in business partners coming together to make a deal.  It’s that art of working together which makes us learn to be accountable.  Yes!  That ‘A’ word we often want to avoid.

Accountability.  No matter where we are in life, what position we hold, what responsibilities we do or do not have, accountability should be our constant companion. How many times do we hear of someone’s “fall from grace” and on the heels of the news we learn that no one around them was asking the hard questions.

Recently, I spoke with someone who was walking through difficult situations in both personal life and ministry.  She confided that although she had acknowledged to others she was facing some struggles, few reached out because they viewed her as ‘strong enough’ to not really need them.  Yet that thought process is rarely a glimpse of reality.  In fact, last I read, we are all fallible humans.

Our Creator knew this truth.  He purposefully designed us to NEED MORE than ourselves.  If we did not need more, we would not need to have a relationship with a Deity greater than ourselves.  He also created us to desire and need connection to others in our lives.  He wanted us to learn more about Him by learning more about healthy relationships.

We all have heard the saying, “No man is an island.”  Even Christ lived this truth while on Earth when He chose to live with His disciples.  And in His darkest hour, He took three men to the garden with Him to pray.  Christ knew the fight He was about to face was one that, in His humanity, He could not fight alone.  He needed the strength gained by having others pray with Him.

It was always His plan that none of us would be an island to ourselves.  None of us would be disconnected.  No leader or pastor would be a law unto themselves.  If we won’t allow others to speak into our lives, how can we “rightfully” speak into the lives of others?  That is how the iron sharpens the iron.

 “Catch the foxes, the little foxes, before they ruin our vineyard in bloom.”          Song of Songs 2:15 (CEV) 

No matter the type of relationship – marriage, dating, co-workers, friends, or our church family – outside circumstances will work to destroy its growth.  The style in which Song of Songs is written causes us to not always understand who is speaking in the verse.  But the words of verse 15 applies the plural nature, making the statement clear:  “Let us fight together to catch the foxes that are hiding, ready to destroy what holds our promise of growing in our trust of each other.”  We all need the trench buddies that we can trust to be at our side and not betray our hiding place.

Ultimately, there is one main relationship to not allow the foxes to destroy.  Our relationship with God Himself.  The enemies fighting that relationship often are small.  Little compromises.  Ignoring that still small voice.  Little indulgences.  Not guarding our spoken words. Letting activities steal our time.  It all fights our connection to our Lord.  That is where the accountability is most important.  When that is broken, our earthly relationships become weak.

Accountability also requires meeting one on one with either mentors or friends who are comfortable to ask the hard questions.  It’s the hard questions that are needed.  The ones that help us to examine our own hearts and motives.  Questions like —–

“How is your heart talk?” 

“What is your attitude to your children?” 

“What happened to the trust you had in your spouse, boss, leader, yourself?” 

“Who’s voice are you listening to?  Who are you secretly talking with?” 

  “How is your prayer life?” 

“Who’s controlling you?  God? Others? Your emotions?” 

“What are you dwelling on in your thoughts?”    

“How well are you fighting the temptations to compromise?  Are your boundaries still clear or becoming blurred?”  

“Who do you need to forgive today?”   

“Is there a scripture to back up how you feel?” 

  “Who’s approval are you seeking?  God’s or man’s?”

Becoming accountable means becoming vulnerable.  You choose to lay it all out there.  The good.  The bad.  The ugly.  There is beauty in watching Him meet you in the broken places.  It is allowing someone else who is trustworthy to see the hidden side of you, walk with you through the mess, and rejoice in the tools you learn as you become whole again.  A you that is more like Christ.

Accountability sets a trap for the foxes in life.  Lack of accountability often ends up in broken relationships.  Too often our defenses block us from allowing others to speak into our lives.  We think they cannot understand where we are.  They just don’t grasp the full picture.  And we walk away, taking our hurts and offenses with us.  Leaving behind us a trail of brokenness.

Being vulnerable.  It is not easy.  It takes courage.  And a desire to become who you were meant to be.  But it is the stuff that makes us better individuals and better as a whole community.

Being raised in ministry, I can relate to the young woman struggling alone.  My heart was always after God.  That resulted in being in leadership from the time I was in middle school.  But looking back, I can honestly say very few people actually knew me.  The real me.  The struggles that only my heart and God heard about.  And with that lack of mentoring came brokenness.  Thankfully for me, it drew me to depend on Jesus even more.  But too often that is not the case.  Too often the broken ones stumble in their hurt, or completely walk away from truth………and no one is there to help.  Honestly, I do not always WANT the hard questions.  But I NEED them.  We ALL do!

Are we joining together and setting fox traps?  Or do we just come to a service on Sunday, get our feel good on, then go our separate ways for the week?  Do our local churches look like community life or is it just a weekly event because of an obligation to a place or person?  Are we truly connected and vulnerable with each other, or could we just be playing the part?  Are our pastors meeting one on one with someone that speaks into their lives other than their spouse; someone who will hear those hidden talks of the heart?  If not, the fox trap has not been set.

Let’s choose to be trap setters!  Let’s make a difference in the world around us by becoming vulnerable and trustworthy to each other.  Let’s catch the foxes before the vine is destroyed.

Who will take this journey with me?  Let’s set the traps together!